Life on Facebook

In January on my family blog, I wrote of learning of life's tragedies through social media or main stream media in a post entitled Death, Facebook and Media.  At the time, that post generated comments from those who had been through that experience and the difficulties it created for them.  Let's be honest, there are some images we never want to see and have burned into our memories.

This month, I have experienced another side of this coin as a family drama has been playing out on Facebook.  I have often heard the euphemism "Don't air your dirty laundry in public."  Well my extended family's laundry has been waving for all to see.

Through this experience, we have watched family members brought to tears as individuals who are not even involved felt the need to comment.  We have seen the collateral damage of pain experienced by others who did not deserve or need this added burden.  We have seen statements made for the sole purpose of hurting a specific group or individual with no consideration beyond their own desire to cause pain.  Bridges of trust and support have been burned and will take a long time to rebuild, if ever.

Needless to say, it has been a rough month and as a result, family or not, our little home has chosen to "unfriend" those involved so that we no longer have to witness the "drama".  For my own part, as I tried to talk privately with the individual involved, I wish I had heeded the words of Thumper, "If you can't say anything nice, then don't say nothing at all."  I should have remembered that you cannot have an open discussion with an individual that does not want to listen.

Also this week, two other items were brought to my attention that are along these same lines.  A dear friend posted as her status how hard it was for her to constantly see posts of children and animals who have been harmed.  A comment was made that even though individuals are trying to create awareness, it does come to a point where you will block those images either by skimming over the posts of the individual or by actually blocking the individual.

The second instance was a post made on our City's Facebook page of an event our community had participated in.  It was meant to be a positive and informative post.  Unfortunately, one individual felt the need in multiple comments to recite all his perceived grievances with the City.  In reading his comments, I recognized how ill-informed the individual actually was.  I have been attending City Council meetings for several months now and have yet to see him there.  Maybe if he had taken the time to attend those meetings or to speak with a council member, mayor or City Administrator, his statements would have been more accurate.

Social Media as a whole is a great tool for reaching individuals, informing, reconnecting and helping us find common ground.  Whether on a personal level or a public level, there is a need to be respectful, thoughtful, and considerate of others.  If you are unwilling to say it to an individual directly, you should not post it online.